What a year.

Gosh what a year.

I started 2021 off with a huge change. Becoming a carer after 9 years in an office job was going to be a challenge, but I am happy and glad to say, that after nearly a year of being in this role, I have zero regrets. It was one of the best decisions I ever decided to make, and am so proud of myself for taking such a big step. I am one of those people that is very happy within my comfort zone, but the past year or two, I have stepped out of that circle multiple times and realised that if you remain within what is comfortable for you, you cannot grow.

This year I spent a lot of time reflecting on my life and figuring out what makes me happy and what does not. Working out if the things that do not make me happy, can be changed. First off was my job. I had known for a while (perhaps even years) that my job made me unhappy, but taking the step to changing that felt terrifying. I had great friends within the company, I knew what I was doing daily and felt comfortable doing so, and it didn't cause me too much stress. It did however, make me miserable. I would dread going to work. This needed to change, and guess what.. I now flipping love my job. Yes, there are days I would rather be in bed (wouldn't we all), but there are also many many days where my heart actually hurts. My wonderful customers have become such a big part of my world, that I now cannot live without.

The other main thing I have thought about this past year, is relationships. I have been single for a while now and having friends who are getting married, having children and buying homes together, just made me a little emotional that I don't have the same things happening in my life right now. I then learnt to realise a few things, the main one being how can I love someone else if I cannot love myself. This to me sounded selfish at first, but it is the truth. You need to love and accept yourself for you, before you can think of adding that special someone in to your world as it will only end up affecting your relationship with them and perhaps the feeling that you aren't being your true self.

So saying that, my main focus in 2022, is to find and be my true self, accept and love myself for who I am, and to become the happiest version of myself. This to me sounds impossible right now, but if others can do it, why can't I and what is stopping me? If you are reading this and feel the same way as me, just know you are not alone, but also, you are the one that needs to take those steps to make the changes in your life that then create your own happiness. It won't be overnight, but without those tiny steps, you cannot expect big changes to happen.

I have so much more on my mind right now, but when I feel ready, I will write about it, I just need to process it all alone first. I have some big changes happening over the next few months, but like I say, when I am ready, I will share.

I hope my learnings from 2021 have helped you, and I wish you all the love and happiness in 2022! Focus on YOU!