IVF Hormones- How they affected me.
Gosh, where do I even start with my emotions and how the hormones affected me.
It really is a mad process to go through where you literally inject yourself daily with hormones. I cried at everything and also noticed my temper was a lot shorter than normal, as I would get frustrated over the smallest things, which isn’t like me at all as normally even though I am quite a high energy person, I am very relaxed and chilled. My periods and my cycle in general affect my moods and emotions quite a bit anyway, but it is controlled and I am aware which week in the month I will be feeling more emotional, more frustrated, or hungrier, but going through IVF just put it on a whole new level. I felt like my control over how I felt, was completely gone. The final week and also the week of egg collection was probably my least emotional, but my gosh I could eat. I have definitely put weight on, but somehow I have had the mental strength to not step on the scales as I know that will massively affect me as I feel I have done so well with not weighing myself too much the last few months and have been more focused on my food and exercise and being healthier. And it was all going so well until I started the injections and wasn’t able to exercise as my risk of getting OHSS was so high and my ovaries were so swollen. This then threw my healthier eating habits out the window as I am very much an “all or nothing” type person and struggle when I am unable to exercise, to then eat healthily, as I don't see the benefits as clearly and quickly. It is however, something I am working on, but now that I am able to exercise again, even if it is just a little bit each week and not too intense just yet, is better than nothing, for my mental state. I do know I need to let my body recover though, as it has been through a lot physically this year with my surgery and IVF, and my ovaries are still very swollen and sore due to all the hormones injected.
I am hoping I never have to go through this cycle of treatment again, as it really is so tough both mentally and physically to deal with, and trying to explain it to others is challenging, as no one fully understands unless they have been through it themselves. I have however, found that since I have been sharing my story online, that the community out there for those struggling with Endometriosis and/or fertility is huge, and everyone is so supportive which has really has helped me get through this, to know that I am not alone. It has also helped me knowing that by sharing my story, I am also helping others. I have had quite a lot of new followers on socials since I started sharing my journey, and also a lot of messages, and for that I am grateful as support means everything. Whether that is me supporting others by sharing what I do and being told it is helping them, or by others sharing their stories either publicly or directly to me, because they have seen my story. It all means a lot and helps so thank you.
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