The past few weeks have been challenging. I cannot even put in to words how I am feeling right now, but one thing I am grateful for throughout this tough time, is the support from those around me, so thank you it really means so much to me.
To give a little update to those that don't know, I have had some upsetting life changing news. Last week I had a scan which showed a few abnormalities. My left ovary isn't functioning and is smaller than it should be, and my right ovary is 2 to 3 times bigger than it should be and is covered in cysts. This is a huge concern when it comes to having children, and so those that know me, will know this came as a shock and was very upsetting to hear. There is hope but it all depends on my operation.
I have an operation booked for next month which is primarily to see if there is anything that didn't show on the scan, as my symptoms aren't typical for Endometriosis so my consultant wants to just be sure it isn't anything else too. He will also remove as much Endometriosis as he can, in hope that helps with my pain and symptoms, but as my previous operation didn't help me, the chances are low. He does think though that my ovaries are what are causing the issues.
If the operation doesn't help, the only other option will be to have my ovaries removed, and due to my endometriosis, he would also suggest a full hysterectomy. This would mean no children and to go in to menopause (or to take HRT for the rest of my life). A lot to take in right now and I don't even know where to start when it comes to processing it all. This first operation next month is worth a shot in both our opinions, before taking the more drastic option.
Before anyone asks, yes I have thought about freezing my eggs, but I have also done a lot of research on this as well as speaking to my consultant, and have decided to not go down that route.
If the second operation is needed, which is highly likely, my only way to have a child biologically, would be to use any eggs I have, straight away and to use a donor seeing as I am not in a relationship right now. This again is a lot to take in and process, so I am hoping my operation next month gives me more time to think.
I want to be a mum.
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